More Pics of Jeff from Leolani

Here are some more pics of Jeff In Bali

Jeff In Bali

Here are some pictures of Jeff In Bali... I was looking through a large stack of photos and these were some that I deeply admired. There wasn’t always time to get to know Jeff  (busy little bee that he was) but there was time enough for him to listen, advise, and guide me, and with that care and attention, I eventually discovered my true self. I will always be forever thankful, grateful and blown away by the amount I learned in a relatively short amount of time. thnx Jeffe!!

    - With deep love and affection to all, Leolani 

From Good Morrow by John Donne

...My face in thine eye, thine in mine appears,

And true plain hearts do in the faces rest;

Where can we find two better hemispheres,

Without sharp north, without declining west?

Whatever dies, was not mixed equally;

If our two loves be one, or thou and I.

Love so alike, that none do slacken, none can die.

- Posted by Karen Young 

The Celebration of Jeff

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing

there is a field. I’ll meet you there.

When the soul lies down in that grass,

the world is too full to talk about.

Ideas, language, even the phrase each other

doesn’t make sense. 

-Rumi

A Celebration in loving memory of 

Robert Jeffery Wolcott

Pacific Cultural Center  

Saturday, January 31, 2009 3:00 pm - 6:00 pm

1307 Seabright Avenue, Santa Cruz, California 95062

Corner of Seabright and Broadway

21 Days Out In the Emptiness

Time is such a strange part of this dream called life. A day or a week, goes by and some seem swift and others seem to last for years. Truly there’s only the moment, the here and now I guess, but I have to admit my sense of time since Jeff’s passing from this phenomenal existence is crazy just like his leaving this dimension has been. The last two weeks have stretched out and it feels like a very long time now. 

Twenty-one days since December 27, (when Jeff passed away) and for me 21 is an auspicious number; for it’s the last card of the major arcana in the tarot, the whirling world, which symbolizes merger in the all: enlightenment. Well, I can feel Jeff’s presence here as I write down these words; and he’s been more on my mind and more with me than when he was embodied, that’s for sure.

Well, that’s all for now, I’m heading off to mediate on my dear friend’s spirit out there dancing and laughing I bet, smiling and joking and being friends with every other spirit he encounters and waiting for us to join him when it comes our time to leap over the edge just like Jeff did. Here’s a short poem that describes how I suspect we all must feel. 

The Farewell

I picked this fragile spring of heather

Autumn has died long since remember

Never again shall we see one another

Odor of time spring of heather

Remember I await our life together.

-Guillaume Appolinaire 

Jeff Gives the Okay Sign

In the final weeks of Jeff's life, when it became clear that he was definitely leaving his body, and it became okay with me to admit that to myself and to verbalize that to him, I asked him if there were any way that he could contact me from beyond the physical to let me know that death was what we thought it was, and that everything was okay, to please try to find a way, if he could and he agreed.

The night after he died I was haunted by images, every time I would awaken during the night, of Jeff's ordeals in the body his final day, and I prayed that his disease in its final stages hadn't made his transit difficult. I know I was just projecting myself into what he endured, but it didn’t help.

The next night, I awakened several times with a different vision of Jeff that totally put my mind at ease, and the imagery was one that was so unexpected and so appropriate that I knew in my heart that it was not just a projection of my desires.

When you jump off a boat in your scuba gear, you are jumping into another realm, a liquid realm. When you jump in, your mask, your fins, your weights and the regulator (breathing apparatus) are all at risk of becoming dislodged or malfunctioning in the transition, and so after you submerge as you hit the water, and you come back up, if everything is OK and you are good to go, you put your arms in a circle for "O" for Okay, and touch the top of your head before you descend.

Jeff, looking as he always looked before he was ill, gave me the Diver's Okay sign, every time I awoke from a dream that night. To me, the symbolism was so parallel, that I knew that I had received the clearest signal that Jeff could send me that he was just fine and that death definitely Okay. 

- Velia Anderson 

A Few More Pics

I went out for a lovely walk in the Redwoods today. Jeff was there, along with the cool air and the moist soil and the green, green, green everywhere, along with the beautiful browns. Memories of walking Fall Creek, once we did it right after a huge storm and water flowed like yosemite. 

Jeff Free Wolcott

A week has almost gone by since Jeff made the transition from bodily form to pure essence and it seems only like moments. He was my best friend, my guide, my confident, and though I've grieved, I’m still in the same space I’ve been ever since I first heard about his illness. This couldn't be happening. It’s unreal. It's unthinkable…yet here I am putting up a Robert Jeffery Wolcott Memorial blog site so that others can express themselves concerning their loss of a dear friend, but also, perhaps what they too have already gained through the months of Jeff's illness and the scant week since he left the face of this earth.

Or has he left? Ah! The curiously new mind of awareness is always asking such questions. I feel his presence right now, just as I used to connect with him from down in Santa Cruz while I sat typing up my dreams in Sonoma.

Maharaj was once asked by a seeker what would happen if somebody cut off his his head, and Maharaj said immediately that only a line of communication would be cut off, nothing else. It's the same with Jeff; yeah, we won't hear that boisterous voice nor feel those huge arms hugging us, but he's still here, he hasn't gone anywhere; or you might say he's everywhere now.

I invite everyone to express themselves here about Jeff, and what wonders and affection he brought forth in their lives. I suspect Jeff's legacy is spread among those he called friends, and each us shared many treasures with this unique, kind, gracious, soft-spoken, strong, clear, satisfied mind that presented itself to us in various bodily guises.

I too will write more soon, as each day passes without jeff and I reflect upon just how much a gift he was in all of our lives.